The Wheaton College Alumni Association numbers nearly 45,000 living alumni, and we hold many views on faith, politics, theology, and just about everything else. I’m grateful when alumni express their opinions about something unfolding at Wheaton because that means they care about their alma mater. 

I just wish we could be better at disagreeing with each other with conviction tempered by grace. 

The last few months have been the most challenging of my ten years as your executive director. Starting in mid-December, when Dr. Larycia Hawkins posted controversial statements on Facebook and the news spread on social media and traditional press around the world, the College has received daily emails, phone calls, letters, and social media posts from alumni. While many alumni have been thoughtful and gracious regardless of whether they agree with the position or actions of the College, I’ve been saddened at how some alumni have expressed themselves, especially on social media. Many comments were laden with vitriol, accusations, and speculation. There were times when it was hard to discern a difference in tone and language from voters’ diatribes about the 2016 presidential campaign.

In January, after Wheaton College in Massachusetts received dozens of angry messages and threats by people who got their Wheaton Colleges mixed up, their president, Dennis Hanno, wrote a piece in The Washington Post bemoaning the “reckless incivility” of this culture stating, “It is not only possible to express disagreement on a matter of principle without resorting to personal attacks and harassment, it should be expected.” 

Friends, please hear my heart on this. I’m not trying to minimize how complicated or painful this situation is, and Wheaton is a better place when alumni show they care and urge us to do better. Please write to alumni@wheaton.edu and tell us what’s on your mind. I read everything that is sent to my attention and will respond with anything I’m free to share. 

My prayer for Wheaton is twofold: first, that our alumni community will love each other by disagreeing with humility and respect; and second, that outside observers like President Hanno and others will notice that we disagree in a way that’s God-honoring and strikingly different from the culture around us.